Takže jsem stála ve dveřích vagónu s flaškou v ruce a svět byl můj nepřítel.
"Vůz pro matky s dětmi je řazen v přední části vlaku," oznamoval Hlas, dávaje najevo naprosté znechucení matkami a dětmi. "Škrr," udělal mikrofon, a potom "Jaúú!" a "Chrr… blublubl."
Kolegové na zbytcích lavic a na báglech na podlaze zvedli hlavy. Každej teď v duchu bádá, jestli Hlasatele podřízli nebo uškrtili. Já nevím, nemám s tím zkušenosti.
"Je to individuální," říkával náš patolog. "Někdo raději škrtí, jiný řeže."
Mikrofon si odkašlal. "Hej, kolegové!" zachraplal neznámý a neviditelný borec. "Vůz pro kuřáky a jiný zrůdy je řazenej až úplně na konci! Hurá! Už na mě jdou! Žijte, volové! Ať žijou zrůdy!"
"Eště se rozbrečí," zahuhlal kdosi u země. Měl hlavu obtočenou pytlem a táhl od něj exotický smrad.
Ozval se zvuk, jako když rozkopnete televizi. Běžná věc, nikdo se nevzrušuje. Odešel nějakej takovej, co mu trest dal až moc do těla, no a vzal si na cestu společnost…
"Vodpráskli ho," pravila upatlaná bába oděná ve stylu Zdrhám ze sirotčince. Beztak na to ještě měla věk. Stoprocentně je mladší než já…
"Drogy vám zničí játra. Ledviny. Krev, kůži, na co si vzpomenete. Zestárnete v pár týdnech… A mozek, potvora, vydrží dost, má rezervy. Rozpadáte se a děláte všechno pro to, abyste nebyli moc při vědomí," říkával náš patolog.
Našla jsem si místo vedle chlápka ve stetsonu. Koukl na mě a přihnul si z flašky s něčím na mytí oken nebo na pucování záchodů. S tím taky nemám moc zkušeností. Ruce si ofačoval. Když vám trest společnosti začne na nohou, schováte je. I břicho a prsa schováte. Horší je to na hlavě a rukou. Do ksichtu se vám každej mrkne a ruce jsou občas potřeba.
Do vagónu vešli dva poldové. Podle předpisu si nasadili masky. Škoda, ten vpředu byl docela fešák. Miluju neoholený brady. Můj bejvalej se pořád holil. Co se stal členem Roanova týmu, dokonce dvakrát denně. Zatahala jsem policistu za rukáv. "Nemáte vejvrtku?"
Setřásl mě jako hmyz. Kdybych byla mol, tleskal by, komára by zaplácnul, mouše utrhal nožičky, pavouka by zašlápnul… Miluju pavouky!
Stetson se nadzvedl, odhalil škaredou fousatou hubu. "Otevřu ti to zubama."
Poldové sebrali nějakou mrtvolu zabalenou v igelitu. Jo, sem uklízeče nedostanou ani párem volů. Hoši měli rukavice a vůbec, mohli chytnout akorát tak kopnutí do koulí, kdyby omylem zvedli živýho. Ale ne, beztak mají chrániče nebo co.
"Fajn," liboval si někdo vzadu. "Smrděl by nám tady."
"Ať už jedou!" zaječela ženská, rozežraná a znetvořená trestem společnosti jako malomocenstvím. "Ať už jedou, doprdele!"
"Přesně tam, madam!" zachechtal se Stetson a vycenil zuby na moji flašku. Nejmíň dvaatřicet, a bílý jako z reklamy.
"Jsou pravý?" zajímala jsem se a sáhla si. Sklaply. Ucukla jsem. Mám trénink. Můj bejvalej mě vyškolil v ucukávání. Hlavně potom, co mu dobří lidé pověděli o Harym. Na uhýbání jsem expert.
Malomocná vylítla a pověsila se na policajta zezadu. Pustil mrtvolu, z igelitu vyčouhla noha, pach hnisu nás praštil přes nos.
"Dělej!" houkla jsem na Stetsona. Vyškubl špunt, ale nejdřív mi nabídl svoje pití. Zkusila jsem. Byl to ten šmejd na okna. Fuj. Lokla jsem si svýho. Zápach dozníval, jak mi postupně otupovaly čichové buňky. "Všechny smysly to nakonec vzdají, analyzátory šrotujou naprázdno…" Tak nějak to tvrdil náš psycholog.
Jeli jsme. Stmívalo se. Láhev byla skoro plná a svět se tvářil jako přítel. Dvě holky tancovaly pod rozbitou zářivkou. Tanec kostlivců. Chrastily. Jednou umřou uprostřed tance, někdo, asi policajt, přivede uklizečku a ta je smete na lopatku. Viděla jsem ji před sebou, statnou ženu v šedivé pracovní zástěře, s kýblem a smetákem. Pak se proměnila v bílou, uniformovanou dámu s bílým čepečkem a říkala: "To se musíte předem objednat!" A ještě taky: "Nadstandartní péče není pro každého!" Zatracený psychiatři.
Někdo do mě dloubnul. "Hele! To je pro tebe!"
Do vagónu vnikl cizí živel. Rozepnul si kabát a kalhoty a předváděl se, akorát že neměl komu. Tanečnice zhasly, malomocná chrápala, babka-sirotek se pokoušela za poslední lavicí souložit s někým, kdo byl asi v bezvědomí, jinak by jí to zaručeně nedovolil. Exhibicionista se s nadějí blížil ke mně a můj soused se chechtal.
Zívla jsem. "Že zrovna já musím mít pech na takový mrňousky!"
Trochu ho to zarazilo. Pak mu podrazili nohy a chvíli ho nechali válet v tom bordelu na podlaze. Udělal to někdo z těch kluků, co kouřili u rozbitého okna. Měli trestem znetvořené nosy, rty a krky. Boule, zduření, co se občas provalí a teče z něj krev promíchaná s hnisem, a taky bradavice, růžový, s rozeklaným povrchem, jednu na druhý.
"Díky," kývla jsem do neurčita v zeleném dýmu, který jen líně stoupal do okna a ven. Ve vagóně se mu líbilo.
Potom jsem nějak odpadla a spala. No co, Demaeren je konečná. Stetson strpěl mou hlavu na rameni, ani si nemusel přihýbat toho svýho ředidla. Asi si zvyknul. Zdálo se mi o vaně s teplou vodou a o chlápkovi, co se předvádí aspoň sám sobě v zrcadle, když nemá po ruce ženskou… Vejdu do koupelny s nožem. "Jdeš na mě jako na Marata?" tlemí se.
Kdo sakra byl Marat? Nějakej Francouz… Co provedl? Nepamatuju si. "Vole. Spravuju zásuvky, někde to vyhazuje pojistky. Nemám šroubovák." Zato mám prodlužku DODO. Má jednu výhodu. Ty kovový kolíky z ní čouhají na obou stranách, bakelit jsem oddlabala. Dodělej si svou vražednou zbraň doma, amatére, když nemáš na re-vol-ver (myslím si pomalu, nekoktám, nejsem ožralá)!
Zase mě šťouchá, kruci! "Co je zas?"
"Uhni, musím se vychcat," pravil Stetson.
"Nojo. Bacha na boty." Mínila jsem svoje. Ve vagónech pro zrůdy se tohle dělá na podlahu. Jenže on vstal a vypravil se do toho kamrlíku, kde byla v podlaze díra. Mísu někdo ukradl. Motal se, slušňák, ale jinak než ostatní. Já vím, jak se motají kolegové. Vím to podle Haryho… Cestou zpátky sundal z něčí hlavy igelitovou tašku. Hlava byla špinavě blond a zelená, do modra ještě ne. Zachránce životů!
"Mohla mít pokoj, blbče," řekla jsem mu.
Něco zavrčel. "Kdo je Roan Miler?" zeptal se pak srozumitelně, div ne spisovně.
"Takovej vrah." Do pytle, už zase mluvím ze spaní!
"Koho zabil?"
"Hele, kecá ti to."
"Tobě víc. Když usneš. Koho zabil Roan Miler?" Ptal se jako policajt. Rozškubla jsem obvaz na jeho ruce. Mokvalo to a bobtnalo. Trest, nepochybně. Nebo ohromně zdařilá napodobenina. Je náš, nebo není?
"Zabil? Pch. Zabíjí! V jednom kuse. Nás."
"Tebe tak někdo zabíjí," ušklíbl se.
Napadlo mě ukázat mu svoje břicho, ale pak jsem se na to vybodla. Nojo. Můžu si za to sama. Sama si můžu za Haryho…
Roan Miler patří k našim duchovním a morálním špičkám. Roan Miler vymyslel, jak může společnost legalizovat drogy. Tým Roana Milera sestrojil umělý virus a vynalezl techniku, umožňující přidávat ho do všech návykových látek, uznaných Komisí za drogy. Roan Miler věděl, co to udělá. Nedávno se k tomu přiznal v televizi. Od té chvíle nám nešel z hlavy. Nám. Mně a Harymu. Jenže na něj nikdo nemůže. Všude chodí s ochrankou. A vlastně ani moc po venku nechodí, všechno mu donesou pod nos. Dostal za zásluhy medaili a milióny!
Ale ta nemoc, trest společnosti, je nakažlivá. Nějak vám virus zmutoval, pánové. Hallor Clatt na to přišel. On, objevitel, si smluvil se svým bývalým šéfem Roanem Milerem schůzku na nádraží v Demaerenu, tam, kde je konečná všech vlaků. Nikdy by za ním nešel do baráku, tolik rozumu přece pobral. Ale ne zas tak moc… Hallor Clatt toužil možná po slávě, možná po penězích, a místo toho leží ve vaně, ve vodě, která už dávno vychladla.
Zkoušela jsem spát, ale nedalo se, rychle jsem střízlivěla. Stetson Škaredá huba je polda. Po čem jde? Po mně? Těžko, Halovu mrtvolu ještě nemohli najít, takhle fofrem oni nepracují… Agent přes zrůdy! A jeho vyrážka? Chemie? Může být. A ředidlo? Barva a chuť sedí, účinky sporné. Jen otevřu oči, položí mi otázku. Vyslýchal by mě dál, mizera, jenomže sirotek - nymfomanka se přišourala a začala ho obtěžovat. Malomocná si něco píchala a nemohla se trefit. Šla jsem jí pomoct. Pak jsme seděly na jejím spacáku, já dorážela flašku, ona čučela do stropu na sprejový malůvky.
Stetson nevydržel a dal babče - sirotkovi přes hubu. Složila se mu k nohám a kvílela.
A přišel průvodčí. Měl uniformu, pistoli, nůž. "Vstávat, pakáži!" zahulákal. "Kdo nemá lístek, toho odprásknu! Já jsem Čistej!"
"Fakt? Ukaž uši!" vyjela jsem na něj. Kantorskej tón ovládám od té doby, co jsem vypomáhala na zvláštní škole. Funguje to.
Průvodčí ze sekty Čistých se zarazil, Stetson skočil, chňapl po jeho řeznické kudle, pistole bez míření vystřelila a zasáhla něčí bágl. Ti dva se váleli v lepkavém svinstvu na podlaze a mlátili se.
"Sázím na Škaredou hubu!" vykřikla jsem. Kolegové se probrali. Většinou netušili, oč jde, ale přihlíželi se zájmem. Jasně že Stetson vyhrál. Byl větší a uměl to.
"Nasadíš mu želízka?" zeptala jsem se nahlas. "Copak nejseš polda?"
Sjel mě pohledem, chytil poraženého za límec a vlekl ho ke dveřím. Část stěny za první lavicí byla roztřískaná, takže jsme viděli, jak Stetson na chodbě otevírá a vyhazuje průvodčího ven z vlaku. Vrátil se, nos nahoru, nafouknutej k prasknutí.
Jako Hallor, když říkal: "Já to Roanovi povídal! Já to tušil od začátku, a teď se to potvrzuje!" Měl na mysli to, co mi začalo růst na těle, to, na co právě noc předtím umřel Hary. Těšil se, že zajde na fetování. Nedopřáli mu to… Rozvod nebude, Hale. Příčina je po smrti. A ty jsi Roanův člověk.
"Konspirace jako prase," sykla jsem. "Zabil jsi ho!"
"Nemůžu Čistý ani cejtit," odsekl.
"Sám jsi čistej!" Ječela jsem na něj, až jsem nepoznávala svůj hlas. "Teda byl jsi! Už nebudeš, agente, seděl jsi tady s náma moc dlouho a pil jsi se mnou z flašky. Je to nakažlivý, vole!"
Chvíli koktal. Tak půl hodiny. Samou hrůzou zapomněl vypadat šeredně. Potom začal myslet. Řekla jsem mu, na jakou schůzku jedu a místo koho. A proč.
Kolegové nás obklopili a poslouchali. Některým to možná matně docházelo. Většinou byli žhaví pomoct.
"A co když kecáš?" zeptal se Stetson.
"V tom případě jsi čistej," řekla jsem tak ošklivě, jak jen jsem svedla. A to bylo hodně ošklivě.
Zbytek cesty uběhl klidně, s trochou zvracení, tu a tam bezvědomím, v zeleném dýmu a úvahách. V Mostech před Demaerenem se agent Stetson Škaredá huba rozhodl.
Kolem Roana Milera postávaly gorily. Zamířili jsme rovnou k němu. Stetson se vytasil s odznakem. "Přivezl jsem Hedviku Clattovou. Má pro pana Milera vzkaz od manžela."
Roan nakrčil nos. Byli jsme jedničky v konspiraci, smrděli jsme autenticky. Ale pokynul. Šli jsme k němu blíž. Kolegové, ti, co se udrželi na nohou, vyrazili na pomoc, to jest objímat a líbat gorily. Přesně v tom momentě jsem se vrhla Roanovi kolem krku a vší silou jsem ho políbila, a taky pro jistotu kousla do rtu.
Skočili po mně, ale Stetson bděl a vložil se do věci. Spadli jsme všichni, Roan na mě, a tak stačilo rozhrnout si bundu a přitisknout si jeho krvácející ret na kůži pod rozepnutou košilí a dát mu ochutnat trest společnosti.
"To mi stačí," řekla jsem udýchaně. "Teď mě můžeš zabít, ty svině!"
Roan mě nezabil, přenechal to velkoryse Spravedlnosti. Pch. Žádnej soud nebude. Doktoři mě nepustí. Ty trhlinky v kůži jsou čím dál hlubší, začíná to krvácet. Brzy asi prasknu nebo co. Rozprskne se mi nějaká větší céva a vykrvácím. To prý je příjemná smrt… Stetson už není Stetson ani Škaredá huba, co si učesal ty fousy, ale včera tady byl a brečel. Mně je veselo. Jsem spokojená. Jestlipak přidávají virus trestu i do těchhle špitálních drog? Doktor to popírá, ale nějak přitom bledne. Ještě že jsem z medicíny včas zdrhla. Jo, a zašeptal mi, že Roan má na obličeji zlou vyrážku. Říká jí akné… Fakt je mi dobře, a svět si nechte pro sebe!
Vůz pro kuřáky a jiné zrůdy
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